Calais has a turbulent history: during the Middle Ages it was fought over by the English and the French. These days, the only battles are among thirsty Brits desperate to find the best deal in Calais, a bargain-hunter's paradise.
My partner Matt and I needed lots of booze and food for a forthcoming birthday party, so we hopped into an Elddis Autoquest 115 for a brief trip over La Manche to find out just how enjoyable a shopping trip in a motorhome can be.

FRIDAY 21.00
Our ferry leaves early in the morning, so we make the most of the fact that we're in a motorhome by staying overnight at the lovely Folkestone Camping and Caravanning Club site, only a few miles from Dover ferry port. Unfortunately its beauty is somewhat lost on us by the force nine gale that is raging outside. We warm up by tucking into fish and chips. I double check my stash of travel-sickness tablets for the following day's crossing.

SATURDAY 07.05
After a 15-minute drive, we arrive at Dover port and take our places in the queue for the P&O ferry. The wind has eased overnight, but I down a couple of travel pills, just in case. We are soon loaded onto the boat, and head for the Club Lounge into which we have booked for the short trip. It's a worthwhile extra: it's peaceful, and we get a complimentary cup of coffee to wake us up. We start making a shopping list but run out of paper.

0937
The Elddis's wheels touch French soil for the first time – something we celebrate by singing 'La Marseillaise'. Our only real plan today is to go shopping, but first we pull over into the Calais aire and make some breakfast.

10.21
We have a few hours to kill, so we decide to go for a drive around the countryside. I get impatient and over-excited about the forthcoming retail expedition.

13.11
Cité Europe is an enormous shopping centre, located close to the Eurotunnel terminal, off the A16 south of Calais. We've chosen to come here rather than go to the other, numerous hypermarkets in the area because there's also a Carrefour supermarché here – the Euro equivalent of America's Wal-Mart.
We reckon that more choice means more bargains.
There's a height barrier atop the entrance to the main Cité Europe car park, so instead we park in a small, muddy area at the top of the site. There's a Frankia A-class alongside us and its occupants peer through the curtains as we lock up and tip-toe through the mud.
There are many other shops at Cité Europe but we are here for just one reason, so we head for Carrefour. The Autoquest has a tasty 473kg payload, and we can afford to carry back a fair quantity of goods so we grab a couple of trolleys (you will need a €1 coin to release one) and separate to grab as much as we can, as quickly as possible. I immediately head for the chocolate aisle.
Matt makes for the cheese.
We stock up on the sort of provisions you can't get in the UK before meeting again in the enormous booze section of the supermarket. And this is where we find our fellow Brits, hundreds of them, all with seemingly the same shopping list as us – it is not surprising as the wine, beer and spirits are remarkably cheap. The French wines are particularly good value, but everything is cheaper than in the UK so we pile up cases of Gallic and New World bottles. Next, we head for the beer, and pile our trolleys even higher.
When we cannot cram in any more – the sides of our trolleys are already bulging in a most alarming fashion – we head
for the checkout and unload everything onto the conveyor belt. While we're waiting, we get told off for taking photos and, despite the fact that Matt speaks more-or-less fluent French, we put the camera away, nod our heads gravely and look suitably remorseful.

15.19
After a lengthy battle involving mud, rocks, rain and two heavily laden trolleys, we eventually get our booty back to the Autoquest. Our German neighbours peer out at us again as we load everything into the 'van. This is where having a motorhome really comes into its own: we utilise the 115's numerous cupboards and cubby holes to store as much as we can, before admitting defeat and loading it onto the floor. After a hearty meal, and more shopping in the Cité Europe complex, we head back to the ferry and the comfort of the Club Lounge. It has been a long and exhausting day. In retrospect, we would like to have stayed overnight at the aire. Anyway, we've discovered that a French day trip for bargains is a lot of fun.
We might even be back next year. But we won't be taking photos at the checkout.